I hate to post what's on my mind for 2 basic reasons. Firstly, because people won't understand, and secondly, because I cannot express myself well. Ironic isn't it? It's just because I cannot express myself well that causes people to misunderstand me sometimes.

My mind is so screwed up, my life is so messed up. To think that people actually think that I'm innocent or naive, but no, I'm not. I'm complicated. Too complicated I think only God can understand me. I really hope someday, I can go to a place where I can be alone. So that I can know whatever things that I do is for God.

Mikki's words kept popping in my head. People who come to church for wrong reasons will leave sooner or later. So am I? Or I don't even know, that perhaps if I am gonna leave someday, then I will come into realization. How can I prove it without waiting to see me will walking out of the church? Leave the cellgroup? No bah, that should not be the solution.

I'm trying hard to balance my emotions. Can Melancholic people stop thinking too much? And also stop being an introvert? ._. Had enough of myself sometimes ahhdeyy! :(

To hate someone hard enough to neutralize the strong love in them, is that the right way? I don't know the answer myself either. But I know that is definitely the fastest way.

How can I keep loving & expect nothing in return? How can love & lust collide unto each other? I hate it when expectations always set in.

努力的时候，眼泪真的会不知不觉地掉下来.

P/s: Ask me out people! I'm sick of thinking too much alone. Maybe fun & laughter can be the remedy for my soul for the time being :D

Lord, enlarge my capacity to love.